6:42pm ... One Year Ago Today.

I officially became a mom.

When I think back on that day... Man.. it SUCKED!!  HA.

Seriously.  When you have to go in for an emergency C-Section... cause you are in Labor for 16 hours... and ONLY 3 cm dilated.  NOT FUN.

Not to mention the poor kid had the cord wrapped around twice..and his big noggin was swelling!

I was scared.  My husband was scared.

I remember crying my eyes out... cause I didn't want a C Section.  But then again.... I got to thinking- WHATEVER - JUST GET THIS THING OUT OF ME!!!

When he arrived... I couldn't keep my eyes off my husband.  (And if I moved my head I was going to throw up from all the junk pumped in me!!!! haha)

The smile he had and the anticipation in his face.  Amazing.

He was so worried about me.  Not to go into detail about the drama... but he told the 7 nurses who were in my room... "My wife comes first."

When he showed me the baby on the operating table... I didn't really care.  I couldn't pay attention!  I was so ill. I just wanted them to sew me up and get this over with!!

Then I saw him.

Without looking at how bloated and awful I looked... Look at that baby. 

 

Another long story short... The overshot my epidural.  I had MASSIVE headaches and didn't think my life would ever be the same.  Add the gas up from a c-section and the headaches where I had to lay down to ease the pain to the GROSS things that happens to your body before during and after pregnancy...

Was it worth it?

Put the crazy emotional hormones aside... and look in my eyes.

I was scared to death.

And I still am.

God has given me something that I have never imagined.

No radio personality in major markets, no TV hosting job could EVER compare to this.

Being a Mom.

 

In this past year... I won't lie.  There are and were some tough times.  Grasping the fact that I am no longer who I was. 

And I'll admit... sometimes I feel jealous of him... cause he's a star.  Wherever we are.

Sometimes I stuff my face and hold a grudge that I am still hanging on to this baby weight.  Thinking it's 'all his fault I got fat'.  **Yeah.  He held me hostage and tied my arms back and shoveled in pizza, ice cream, cheesesteaks, cotton candy....  I swear he did!!!  =)  **

 

But in the end... I have this.

 

And this....

 

And this...........

 

Happy Birthday little boy. 

May I give you the life you deserve.  May God give me the grace and goodness to always be kind and understanding to you.  May your daddy and I always do what's right in raising you.

May all your dreams come true, Shining Star.

 

Love,

Your Mommy - For Life.